Wednesday, April 7, 2010

What I've Learned...

I'm currently sitting on my little couch in my quiet apartment listening to South Pacific-the 1958 movie version of course I just got it from Amazon-and I just finished reading my first blog for this class. I talked about my fight with the cursor-a fight I still have to this day. After reading it I read my last one, which funny enough is also about technology. I guess you could say I've come full circle. I also noticed another theme between my first and last blog, besides me complaining about computers, I talked about writing. The point of each blog is to voice my opinion on what I've learned. You could also say that the first and last blogs are the opening and closing conclusions of a paper with the other blogs as the body, proving by examples what I've learned and am opinionated about. It's me writing m y thoughts. Well, on that note, this is what I've noticed I learned...
I realized I read a lot of things I normally wouldn't. There are a lot of books or topics, or authors I would never read, frankly because I never heard of them, but mostly it's not what I thought I would be interested in. But I'm glad I did. I learned from them. Not only did I learn a nice story and some simple themes, but with critical theory I can dig deeper and learn more. I could feel the cogs in my brain turn and work a bit harder than they usually do.
I also love that as I learned about these theories and discussed them I was able to use them in my everyday life. I saw them everywhere and in everything. I saw them in books, movies, music, life scenarios, work, and church. I noticed looking back that I especially dug deeper in the oddest of things, like Disney.
So in the end, I've learned more about me than I thought I would. I learned that if I just let go and look harder I can get more out of literature which will carry over into my life. I've also learned that no matter what anyone else thinks, my opinion counts and it should be shared so that others can gain something from it, what ever it may be. I've also learned a lot more about different authors and different genres that I like and should read. For someone like me, that is something special. Well South Pacific is on the last song and I think I'll end this blog and listen a bit more closely so that I can see what I can learn from it, and maybe sing it out loud before the roomies get home. :) It's been a great semester, I'm sad to see it end.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Technology Woes

I was reading someone's blog about the problems with technology, and between the world and me, I've had a ton. For some reason technology is out to make me miserable although I offer my hand out in peace. So in memory of my technology problems I thought I would share a portion of my very first blog entry ever.

I would become a blogger...Little did I know (what a simple, yet powerful and usually scary phrase) that this would become my Mount Everest of the internet/technological world. Someone like me who likes flipping the pages of a book over the scrolling of a sidebar should have known that something like this is not so simple and "easy" as it appears to be for others.
The realization that this will stick with you "FFFFooorrreeevvvvveeeerrrr" (thank you Squints) is a little intimidating. Pick a name, pick a layout, don't like that lay out go to a webiste and switch it. Don't like that one you just switched it to, its ok. Try another. Oh wait, its not working. Try again. Still not working. Maybe get out of everything and start all over. Nothing changed. Hmmmm maybe you still have the original copy lets copy something different just to make sure. Yep, its working. Hmmmm, well maybe I'm the exception to the rule. Lets try the FAQ page. Well that didn't help just like every other FAQ page. What made me think that would work? Hope. Well sometimes hope is overrated. So then what, well maybe the program has had its fun and done watching me suffer in agony and feel as though I'm definitely not smarter than a 5th grader. Nope, the mocking continues.
The hands go up in the air and come back down pounding the couch cushions. All the while an exasperated noise escapes as the head frustratingly hits the back of the couch barely missing the wall. Although, if it would have hit the wall it would have given more of an excuse to throw a tantrum, like the little child that you are slowly regressing to. But alas, no such luck. So what now? Maybe in all of that someone will show mercy and come help. A rescue. If I remembered moors code I'd S.O.S. someone. Fortunately a kind Fairy Godroommie happened to turn her head in my direction and came over to help. There she was deleting 13 (could be more but we didn't start counting till a little later) of my failed attempts. and with a wave of her magic wand there it was the layout I had been trying to get for over an hour.
Ok I feel better now. I can do this. Whats next a picture? Are you serious. Another decision? It's like that scene in You've Got Mail, "The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc".
Now I do know how to make decision, but such things as colors, fonts, layouts, titles, pictures, are meant to take time. This is a serious matter. Well after picking one picture I, of course, decide to change it. So I pick the first picture I thought of (a very true to life picture unfortunately, but hey it brings a smile to others). So I decide, I should crop it out. So I open this picture in another program to crop it and make it pretty. So I hit save and look i that folder I saved it to, and to my technological track record there was no change. "Nooooooooooooo. you've got to be kidding me." More grunts, more hands flaring, more frustration. It's a good thing I don't swear. So I try again, and again, and again. Finally I decide hey, I need to let other people of my woes. So I update my facebook status aad with it a bribe and a plea for help. And wouldn't know it, that at that time my Fair Godroommie happened to have read it and took me up on my bribe and helped me out. Well she once again waived her magic wand and there we go. Saved as I had cropped it. (I would tell you how she did it but my pride has already been hurt enough. It's really embarrassing. I chalk up my stupidity to a long day.)
Ok upload picture. Oh wait how do I do that again? I need to write these things down. Ok here it is. Upload and done. Lets preview. What? The other picture is still there? I just want to blog. Why can't I just blog? A voice is heard from the left "Denise, you can still blog. You can continually update and fix things as you go." My fairy Godroommie is wise.

In the end I still have blogging problems and probably will as long as I blog. Maybe I'll try writing it on a huge billboard for all to read instead. Ya, I think I could handle that.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

A Literary Conference

I absolutely love conference! The general authorities have such an elegant way of articulating their point. As I listened I tried to see if anyone used any Literary references. One of them mentioned “The Hiding Place”. As I listened as he retold portions of the story I thought of how I’ve been reading Night for class. I thought we were quite aligned in a literary sense. Then elder Ballard went ahead and touched on some poetry with a Ralph Waldo Emmerson poem. I also noticed some pretty awesome alliteration by many of the authorities but I especially liked the tongue twister that Elder Ballard was using with the P’s. I wasn’t able to write down all of it, but yet I remember I was in amazement. Besides being spiritually enlightened I love that I also feel enlightened in a secular way because of the authors they use as examples. Even if some of these men didn’t have an educated background you know that the Lord has blessed them with that knowledge and ability to learn it and then teach it. The Lord has truly inspired men and women all over the earth to write and create wonderful poems, plays, books and even lyrics so that we can learn from them in addition to the scriptures.

Good Friday Realization

Yesterday was Good Friday. And I must say it was one of the best Good Fridays I’ve had. A few days each week I give a coworker of mine a ride to work. I pick up her up in front of the Wilk and we drive to work discussing our nights, our mornings, and usually what we’ve talked about in school. Yesterday we happened to talk about William Wordsworth-we’re both fans. As we were talking we mentioned what songs we have in our heads. At the time some Sound of Music songs. Then we went to a meeting discussing how to give good customer service and how we can increase our scores. Well then I get a call from a member-as we call them- and I do some research for her make some calls and call her back telling her everything has been found that she sent and everything is A-OK. Then the next song that came into my mind was (this is a little embarrassing) It’s Such a Good Feeling from Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood. I just feel like to day is an especially “Good Friday”. I’m helping people, I have a beautiful picturesque image of a Wordsworth poem in my mind and singing some pretty happy songs. I love how so many things can come together, from literature, to music, to childhood memories, to new goals and especially helping people. I feel like maybe I should start my paper for the final but in doing so and thinking about my attitude that has come from yesterday I realized that my attitude can effect how I write and interpret things. I don’t know why this took so long for me to realize but I’m glad it did. So now depending on if I want to convey something, sad or happy, or if I want to let the reader decide then I'll have to be in an unbiased mood-which could be tricky. Maybe if it wasn't for Good Friday then I might never have figured this out, or at least it would have taken a long time. Thank goodness for Good Friday.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Outside The Box

My first class ever at BYU was an eye opener. We were going over the syllabus with the teacher and questions were being asked out the wazoo. Everyone wanted to know the specifics of each paper, each test, each homework assignment. I said nothing. I sat and watched. People seemed so worried about the particulars of each assignment. I admit I laughed a bit to myself. I thought of Minkus from Boy Meets World (a classic show, well at least the few). He was always worried about the grade and had to know how everything went. I didn't understand why people were like that.
I absolutely love when there are no rules. I love when you have to think outside the box, because I tend to do that anyways, which can be good but can be bad. I love not having restrictions. I know that finals can be scary, and I've had some doozies in my life, but I must admit that this final in this English class gives me a smile. I know what I'm going to do, I have yet to write it or figure out my presentation but the idea is one that I know I can talk about. I almost dread the beginning by I will love the ending. This is my kind of assignment.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Mixed Feelings

I think that I liked it so much because I am more of a visual person. Once I start reading a story or play I automatically think of how it would look on screen. I mean isn't that the point? Writers try so hard to convey what the characters look like, or the scene, or the time of it all. They tell you what happens and try to "paint a picture" for the reader. Well with the play being acted out or the book being made into film isn't it just coming to life? Isn't that what the reader wants-well when it comes to certain characters- they want them to be real? I'm not saying movies are better than books, everyone knows the books are always better, but still they seem to add something to the book. And why not use the media and technology of today to explain literature? They are great tools to be used. I'm also not saying we should use them every time. I think it should be a treat when its used.
At BYU we have the perfect example. As I was sitting in RS I thought of how nice it was to have a power point presentation and how sometimes we use Mormon Messages to add to the topic. Then I thought of the last time I was in a regular ward and was taught with the traditional printed out quotes or the thirty year old pictures from the library that all hang from the chalkboard. It's an entirely different feel altogether. Although one style is new and the other old they both teach the message we are supposed to be learning. I can appreciate the old style and that's how I grew up, but its definitely refreshing to have a new style.

Of course the ultimate answer is between the extremes of Purves and Bloom I would want the happy medium of Croft! :) You have to know the old to appreciate the new. The new is based off the old. Put a little Beethoven with your Frank Sinatra, add it to the Beatles and together they'll be partying it with Michael Jackson and Owl City. Or in other words, The Bible+Shakespeare + Austin+Lewis=J.K. Rowling. You can't go wrong with the classics but don't snub the modern.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Disney's Flirting With "The Line"

Yesterday I was talking to my mom. I told her I bought Disney’s “Princess and the Frog”. She asked if I saw it in theaters and I said no, but you can rarely go wrong with Disney. Then my mom said ya…… and I asked what she meant by the tone in her voice when she said “ya…” my mom then asks if I liked “The Little Mermaid” I said well of course I grew up on that. I watched it everyday for months. Then I asked why. I answered her before she said could answer. I asked if it was because she rebels against her father, is immodest, that she lies to her dad, that she does dealings with a devil like creature? And my mom says well that could be. I then went on to remind her that she bought that movie for me, before I even knew what it was. I then went on to say that I turned out alright. I was never super rebellious-in fact my rebellions were hardly noticed- and I rarely got into trouble, and now I’m going to school, working, and living a good and righteous life. She said that was true. After this little discussion with my mom I thought how sad that we are discussing the moral dilemmas of a children’s story. And then I thought of the Bible. It tells us of bad things that people are doing and how they turn around and do good, or are destroyed, so does that mean we shouldn’t read the Bible? Of course not, but this was just another added thought to the never ending debate over what is or isn’t appropriate in books and movies, and what should we do about he ever changing line.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Othello

Recently I was thinking about Othello and all the lies, betrayal and death that came up in the story. I wondered if people can be so easily swayed. Othello doesn’t even try to ask Cassio about anything, and automatically believes what Iago tells him. Furthermore, his self esteem must be so low that he doesn’t even believe his wife that she isn’t betraying him. Why would he think like that? Do we automatically assume the worst in people and believe the worst in us so as to justify and then believe such lies that are spread? I think we like to think that we, as spirit daughters and sons, we look for the good in people first, and we give people the benefit of the doubt. But as earthly humans, we tend to second guess ourselves and believe the wrong. I wonder if Othello had as much regard for humans and God, as Desdemona did, that he would not have believe Iago so easily and that he would have investigated himself in the proper fashion. Is Shakespeare secretly trying to say that as humans who don’t believe in god or truly try to live by His teachings that we are easily subjected to such horrific and self damaging thoughts? I think Shakespeare can definitely be studied through religious eyes and although a lot of his tragedies have some good themes (religions, God, love, loyalty, etc…) but they are overshadowed by the more harsh ones (betrayal, lust, revenge, jealousy, etc…). Maybe the real tragedy of it, is not that people are wrongfully and unjustly killed, but that those who are too close minded miss the underlining meanings and morals of it all.

Monday, March 22, 2010

The Reception

Last week I helped at a reception for someone in my ward. And as I was serving drinks I looked over and there was the wedding party taking pictures. And I as I watched the story “A Good Man Is Hard to Find” by Flannery O’Conner seemed to come to mind. Not that there was a group of guys coming to kill anyone, not that there was a cat or noisy kids or anything like that, and not that they had southern accents (although it was an Irish theme and there were some fake Irish accents heard from time to time) but that the bride instantly reminded me of the grandma. There she was, sitting on a chair dead center of the picture with her husband and their families standing behind her. And the bride had this “don’t mess with me I rule the world and I will rule your life for as long I live” look plastered on her face in each picture. My mind instantly went to the grandma and how she will probably be the boss of her children, and her grandchildren and even though she doesn’t have the southern “charm” she definitely has the matriarch vibe. I must say I was surprised that I was able to connect her with someone I had read about and I must say I was even grateful so that I could compare her with someone, even if it wasn’t the best character to compare her too.

Later on one of the guys from my ward came over to help me watch over and serve the drinks and as he was stirring the punch he started to recite the line from Macbeth “Bubble, bubble toil and trouble…” I couldn’t help but laugh thinking that the Flannery O’ Conner story and Macbeth are tragedies and yet here we are at this joyous occasion. I really hope we didn’t jinx anything.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

To Read/Watch Or Not To...

So last Saturday I tried to go watch Slumdog Millionaire twice at the international cinema. Each time it was full. Yes I have already seen it, but I thought it would be nice to see on the big screen where I could actually read the subtitles. Anyways, before going I was talking with my roomies about watching it. One was semi pro and the other con. We talked about ratings and morals and such and the difference between watching movies edited or not. One roomie said she didn’t want to support the makers of an R rated film even if it was edited. But then I thought, well I’ve seen some PG 13 movies that are worse and I go support those ratings. So if you see one PG 13 movie that’s bad does that mean you shouldn’t support them from now on? And does this carry over to TV and books and magazines? If you read a bad book from one genre does that mean you shouldn’t support that genre anymore, or author? We’ve been told as members of the LDS church to watch things that are uplifting, but could it be that one movie or book is uplifting to one and to another its not? I think yes, and that’s why the brethren let us choose. There seems to be a very fine line between what’s allowed and what isn’t allowed. It’s up to ourselves to pick choose what’s right for us and if we feel we have a clear conscious about it. Personally I feel saddened when I hear people go out to see the latest rated R movie not caring because “it looks so good”. If one peaks my interest enough and I happen to get a copy of it I’ll watch it edited. I really don’t have an answer quite yet on this topic, but I intend to do some research and examining and figure out at least for myself, some sort of guideline to follow.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

You've Got Blogs

Ok so I wrote this a week or so ago and forgot to post it, so here it is better late than never.

I’ve been thinking about the moral views of the main “chickflicks” that I watch. One just happens to be You’ve Got Mail. I do admit it is not the best example morally. It has two sets of people living or “practically living” together. It mentions infidelity and homosexuality. One could even argue that the main characters are cheating on their current lovers by chatting online and noticing that more than friendly feelings are starting to develop. I guess by those standards you would think that it’s a horrible movie and no one should watch it. Well doesn’t there have to be some sort of moral dilemma so that the characters can grow and learn? The “belly of the whale” moment for Joe Fox (Tom Hanks’ character) comes while he is stuck in an elevator and Kathleen Kelly (Meg Ryan) I’d say once her store closes. By the end of the movie they dump their previous lovers after realizing they no longer love them. The enemies become friends, and they fall madly in love with each other through one of the best ways that two people should fall in love, through friendship. They turn their lives around and decide whats truly important. I’m not sure where to rank it. It’s definitely cleaner than other “chickflicks” and might I say more quotable, but it still eludes to immoral behavior but with a proper and gratifying ending.

Tom Hanks “Don’t cry shop girl.”

Meg Ryan “I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly.” Then they kiss and a great song starts as the camera pans toward the sky. (sigh)

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

A Literary FHE

So last night for FHE we decided to play Mafia. How original I know, but it was a fall back due to the fact that we just got a brand new FHE leader so things were kind of unorganized. So I was nominated to be the narrator. Which to be honest, I prefer. I hate being Mafia where I have to kill people, and I hate to be a cop because I feel as though there is pressure to actually pay attention to the game. And whenever I’m a citizen, well lets just say I tend to talk or send messages from the grave without realizing it. As the narrator I can make up stories, know whats going on and I can keep things moving along so it doesn’t go too long. Anyways, as I was trying to think of scenarios for people to have been killed by the mafia I started thinking of the poems, and books and stories I had been reading in class, and before you know it I was having people die like people died in the stories I had read or they were killed by a character from a poem (example eaten by a tiger). I had to tell people that it was because of my class I was thinking of all these odd scenarios. Needless to say they were interested in the class and what I was reading. Who knew even during an FHE game such as Mafia, one could bring up the literature one was reading.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Me and My Roomies

I thought of adding a oicture the moment I hit publish, so here is a picture of me(left) and my two roomies (middle and right) to help with the visualization of the previous blog.

A Vacuum, Headphones, and Homework

In trying to think about something to write about and also trying to help my roommie find a book of hers, I for some reason come to thought of Emily Dickinson. I think about the life she lead and of what she wrote about it. And its funny to me that anyone would have thought what she wrote about was crazy. I mean, look at her life. Look at other poets, or authors lives and what they wrote about. As authors we write about what we know. And if we don't know it, we study it and then we know it. It's almost impossible to write about something you don't know.
As I read other blogs I thought about what they wrote about it and how their thoughts or poems or articles had to do with something of their life, whether they were going through it or a friend was. Thats what we do, we write about our life.
So tonight I'm writing about what I know. I know that my roommate at this very moment has her backpack turned upside down and over the kitchen trashcan emptying it out of any and all crumbs that may have accumulated over the past few weeks. My other roommie is sitting in her reclining chair with black headphones in her ears, a yearbook on her lap and her computer on top of that. I'm assuming she's catching up on a show that was missed while we were all being spiritually enlightened at our stake institute class. And then there is me. Sitting smack dab in the middle of the love seat doing her homework to the sound of, well used to be silence but now is a vacuum sucking the cookie crumbs from the innards of a backpack.
Could this be a poem? Why not. Could this be in a movie? I hope so. Could this be in a blog? It is now! Isn't writing grand?

Friday, February 12, 2010

An Article for Thought

In light of the upcoming holiday I thought I would share an article I wrote some time ago. It seemed to be fitting.

The King Inside

Let’s take a journey back to our childhood. Remember back in the day, a little movie called, “The Lion King”? Well, I think we can learn a lot from it, if we just look. (You know you want to keep reading, if anything out of pure curiosity). And one part in particular seems to be standing out to me.

So I’m sorry, but I’m not going to give you a brief summary of the Lion King. If you don’t know it, I suggest for you to go borrow the movie from someone in the ward and watch it. So now that that’s been said, let’s dive in shall we? In the song “Can You Feel the Love Tonight”, there is a part where Simba and Nala actually sing their thoughts about each other. Which goes as such:

Simba thinks, “So many things to tell her, but how to make her see. The truth about my past? Impossible! She’ll turn away from me.”

Nala then thinks, “He’s holding back, he’s hiding. But what, I can’t decide. Why won’t he be the king I know he is, the king I see inside?”

Wow. Could anything be truer for men and women? I tell ya, Disney got it right. They should do a fireside on this, or write an article. Oh wait, I am. Well ok then. Oh… I’m sorry, did you not understand? Well I’ll tell you. In the single boy and girl world that we are presently in, boys tend to think that girls will turn away from them because of their past and maybe even present, and so they are afraid. And girls only see the future and (key word) potential, and get frustrated when guys can’t see it. Let’s go deeper.

Some boys often see themselves in the past or in the present. They think of their rebel days or maybe how they were immature, or how their family life was or is. They think of how much school they have left, how they don’t have a car, or the whole lack of money issue. So in turn, they assume no one will accept them. They seem to think that if they are having trouble getting the “High School” image out of their own heads then other people (mainly girls) will too. It’s hard for them to see themselves as anything different, and so they act like that. They succumb to the lower expectations or potential. And because of this they get discouraged, especially when it comes to dating. But what they don’t realize is that most girls don’t think that way.

The first thing a girl sees in a guy, whether he be a friend, someone they’re interested in, or even just Joe Shmoe, is his potential. Girls look to the future. They don’t care how the guy was in High School. High school’s over. They care about how he can and will grow. They see him as a provider, proctor, and yes even as a future king. As Nala says, we can see who he is inside and so we try to treat him as the man he is becoming, and as the Priesthood holder he is so that he can see for himself what we see.

So what is the point I’m trying to get across? The point is no matter what we’ve done in the past, or how we may have been perceived, we should always rise to our full potential. We’re all guilty of falling back into the past or acting like idiots because that may be what people treat us as. But we need to “remember who we are” and see each other as we should be seen, as our Heavenly Father sees us. And we need to help each other rise up instead of fall down. If others are treating you with their low expectations, then say something to them, or bypass them and find someone who will help lift you.

Monday, February 1, 2010

An Angelic Look at Wordsworth

I decided I really like Wordsworth's poem, I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud. The more I read the more I realized how spiritual it is, or how spiritual nature is. I actually can picture this in a few different ways. The obvious way would be as someone walking and admiring nature and waht an inspirational experience that is in itself. But for some reason the line "When all at once I saw a crowd, A host, of golden daffodils," struck me. I like the fact that it comes after the reader is already placed high in the sky or Heaven, if you will. As I read that line I picked out the three words that stood out most which, to me, were: crowd, host, and golden.
As I thought about these words I thought of the scriptures and how it talks about a host of angels or how the light of God can be seen as golden, or I picture how we were all crowded together learning from God. For some reason I then transform this poem to being places in Heaven, and every word is symbolic of something heavenly. I then begin to see things in a new light.
Taking that concept of angels, I also started to think, that maybe this could be the point of view of an angel looking down on earth in awe of what god has created. The angel can see everything, and yet, can't necessarily have the human experience of it. The angel must look down and describe as it can, what earth and humans are like. I can't remember who said it, but someone referenced Disney's Fantasia. I think that this could be a scene in a movie like that, that is only intensified through music.
Finally I love how the last stanza shows us how we can reflect any time we want on the beauties of the earth, and how that will give us joy and peace. Wordsworth and his sister, sure got it right.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Coinsidence, I Think Not

Sunday was my ward conference and the stake president was the last one to speak. He quoted a poem at the end of his talk. As I listened to just a portion of the poem I wrote down the title not remembering or hearing the author's name, so that I could read it later. Then later this week as I was going through more of the poems I was assigned to read there it was, the poem that I heard a day earlier in church, The Lamb, by Blake.
As I read the poem I pictured a mother telling this poem to a young child as a bed time story. I love how it brings up such huge questions, cosmic questions, and yet its meant to be understood by all ages. I also love how a lot of the examples or questions that are presented can be taken in a personal childlike way. You could replace the word lamb for child or son. Every child is a child of God and its a very easy way to associate that principle with this poem by replacing the word. It brings God to a level that the reader can understand. The poem compares Him with us mere mortals.
In a way I could see this poem being taken from Psalms in the Bible. I think it would fit very nicely. After all it was meant to be song.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Robin Hood and Little John

As I celebrated MLKJ Day I watched Disney's Robin Hood. And as I watched I realized that I can use the teachings of BYU anywhere and in anything. As I watched I commented to my roommie how the hierarchy of the positions matched the food chain of the animals. Darwinism was right there disguised as a fun child's movie for all to love.
As I continued to watch and listen I found the words to be quite witty, so witty that a child would have missed the context completely. As I watched I thought of all the underlined morals, themes and messages that were being poured onto the screen. I started analyzing every little thing and realized that here I was Monday night picking apart and critically thinking about a Disney movie. What has happened? Sure I still enjoyed it for what it was and for the laughter, the songs, and the little rabbits with their adorable accents, but now I was seeing it in a new light.
Is this what BYU does to us? And now that I think of it, I was analyzing other movies, and books and stories that I read and watched in the past few days. It seemed as though I was taking our class activity of Dancing Through the Decades to another level, which included movies, scriptures and books. Will I ever be able to enjoy just reading a book or watching a movie for sheer pleasure? Of course, but now I can peel away the layers of what has been written and use some critical theory to broaden my horizons.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Fighting with the Cursor

Why is it, that whenever I take the time to sit and write out my thoughts all I see is a sheet of white paper in my mind? I had a teacher that would say, "Always write. Write long, write short, write fast, write slow, write at night, write in the morning, write on your couch, write under a tree, write about sad things, write about happy things, write about colors, or people, or cars, or classes, friends or family, far off countries or your own hometown, but just write."
Easy for him to say. Sometimes I'll sit with my fingers softly touching the keys of my Cherry red laptop and wait for something to write about. I'll begin a sentence and then immediately hit the backspace button until I'm back where I started. A blank box with a blinking cursor laughing, almost mocking me for not being able to write. "I thought you wanted to be a writer?" it says, "I thought you wanted your voice out there for all to hear?" And so, to prove the cursor wrong, I try again only to repeatedly hit the backspace as before.
Sometimes, I admit, the cursor wins the battle , and I close out of my blog with nothing posted, no insight to share, no thoughts forever recorded in cyberspace. But I'm proud to admit that even though this is a bunch of nothingness that I have written, at least it's written. Point for me.