I was reading someone's blog about the problems with technology, and between the world and me, I've had a ton. For some reason technology is out to make me miserable although I offer my hand out in peace. So in memory of my technology problems I thought I would share a portion of my very first blog entry ever.
I would become a blogger...Little did I know (what a simple, yet powerful and usually scary phrase) that this would become my Mount Everest of the internet/technological world. Someone like me who likes flipping the pages of a book over the scrolling of a sidebar should have known that something like this is not so simple and "easy" as it appears to be for others.
The realization that this will stick with you "FFFFooorrreeevvvvveeeerrrr" (thank you Squints) is a little intimidating. Pick a name, pick a layout, don't like that lay out go to a webiste and switch it. Don't like that one you just switched it to, its ok. Try another. Oh wait, its not working. Try again. Still not working. Maybe get out of everything and start all over. Nothing changed. Hmmmm maybe you still have the original copy lets copy something different just to make sure. Yep, its working. Hmmmm, well maybe I'm the exception to the rule. Lets try the FAQ page. Well that didn't help just like every other FAQ page. What made me think that would work? Hope. Well sometimes hope is overrated. So then what, well maybe the program has had its fun and done watching me suffer in agony and feel as though I'm definitely not smarter than a 5th grader. Nope, the mocking continues.
The hands go up in the air and come back down pounding the couch cushions. All the while an exasperated noise escapes as the head frustratingly hits the back of the couch barely missing the wall. Although, if it would have hit the wall it would have given more of an excuse to throw a tantrum, like the little child that you are slowly regressing to. But alas, no such luck. So what now? Maybe in all of that someone will show mercy and come help. A rescue. If I remembered moors code I'd S.O.S. someone. Fortunately a kind Fairy Godroommie happened to turn her head in my direction and came over to help. There she was deleting 13 (could be more but we didn't start counting till a little later) of my failed attempts. and with a wave of her magic wand there it was the layout I had been trying to get for over an hour.
Ok I feel better now. I can do this. Whats next a picture? Are you serious. Another decision? It's like that scene in You've Got Mail, "The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc".
Now I do know how to make decision, but such things as colors, fonts, layouts, titles, pictures, are meant to take time. This is a serious matter. Well after picking one picture I, of course, decide to change it. So I pick the first picture I thought of (a very true to life picture unfortunately, but hey it brings a smile to others). So I decide, I should crop it out. So I open this picture in another program to crop it and make it pretty. So I hit save and look i that folder I saved it to, and to my technological track record there was no change. "Nooooooooooooo. you've got to be kidding me." More grunts, more hands flaring, more frustration. It's a good thing I don't swear. So I try again, and again, and again. Finally I decide hey, I need to let other people of my woes. So I update my facebook status aad with it a bribe and a plea for help. And wouldn't know it, that at that time my Fair Godroommie happened to have read it and took me up on my bribe and helped me out. Well she once again waived her magic wand and there we go. Saved as I had cropped it. (I would tell you how she did it but my pride has already been hurt enough. It's really embarrassing. I chalk up my stupidity to a long day.)
Ok upload picture. Oh wait how do I do that again? I need to write these things down. Ok here it is. Upload and done. Lets preview. What? The other picture is still there? I just want to blog. Why can't I just blog? A voice is heard from the left "Denise, you can still blog. You can continually update and fix things as you go." My fairy Godroommie is wise.
In the end I still have blogging problems and probably will as long as I blog. Maybe I'll try writing it on a huge billboard for all to read instead. Ya, I think I could handle that.